I wasn't kidding when I said

that we have a Crabbies umbrella to give away. And now it's raining. And now you're kicking yourselves for not having a giant green umbrella in your life right? Well, never fear, we've held on to it. SOMEONE TAKE THE UMBRELLA. IT LOOKS A LOT LIKE THIS ONE THAT YOU CAN BUY FOR £15 ON THE INTERNET:

OURS IS FREE TO A GOOD HOME. EVERYONE WANTS FREE STUFF.

Stay dry this summer or some equally cheesy sign off tagline and insert creepy wink<here>

May Dates!

Here you go kiddos!

• Mon 30 - Outside the Box Comedy: THE NOISE NEXT DOOR/ TONY COWARDS/ DAVID WHITNEY/ LAURA LEXX/ MAFF BROWN tickets

Tues 01 - Banquet Records: ANTI-FLAG/ VERSUS THE WORLD/ RADIO ALCATRAZ - tickets|facebook
Wed 02 - Banquet Records: ANTI-FLAG/ SUCH GOLD/ RADIO ALCATRAZ - tickets|facebook
Thurs 03 - Access to Metal: MORDECAI/ ESCAPE ARTISTS/ XENICIBIS/ VANITY DRAWS BLOOD - facebook
Sat 05 - Banquet Records: THE MENZINGERS/ RIVALRIES SOLD OUT
Tues 08 - GO TEAM GEEK: COCKPIT THEATRE
Wed 09 - Banquet Records: RED CITY RADIO  CANCELLED :(
Thurs 10 - BURY THE GUN/ SUPPORT TBA facebook
Fri 11 - Banquet Records: COBRA SKULLS/ UNIFORMS/ EVERYTHING WE LEFT BEHIND tickets|facebook
Sat 12 - WEIRDSVILLE: THE MOJO KINGS/ DYNAMITE PUSSY CLUB. FREE ENTRY! 
Sun 13 - Banquet Records: BRIDGE AND TUNNEL/ GREAT ANCESTORS/ GNARWOLVES tickets|facebook

• Mon 14 - Outside the Box Comedy: BARNEY FROM WATFORD/ NICK BEATON/ HENRY PAKER/ MAFF BROWN tickets

Thurs 17 - SIZES/ TREVOR'S HEAD/ SPLINTER GROUP facebook
Fri 18 - THE JO BURT EXPERIENCE/ CAPTAIN HORIZON/ STAR SCREAM tickets|facebook
Sat 19 - HOLD YOUR HORSE IS/ ANISON/ THE BRILLIANTLY SIMPLE facebook

• Mon 21 - Outside the Box Comedy: ZOE LYONS/ NICK WILTY/ BARRY CASTAGNOLA/ MAFF BROWN tickets

Tues 22 - TAKE ME HOME/ SUPPORT TBA
Wed 23 - Are You Proud?: DEATH OF AN ARTIST/ PALM READER/ HOUSEFIRES/ NORTHPAW tickets|facebook
Sun 27 - Invect/ SUPPORT TBA

• Mon 28 - Outside the Box Comedy: GREG DAVIES/ MIKE WILMOT/ LLOYD LANGFORD/ JEFF LEACH/ MAFF BROWN tickets

Pretty good right?

Anti-Flag - Tuesday and Wednesday!

This is Anti-Flag. If you don't know them (which you totally do, everyone does...!), they sound like this:

And they are playing this:

here:

on these days: 

and you can buy tickets from these lovely people:

by clicking here and here. DONE.

DOWNLOAD PASSES TO GIVE AWAY!

"Ok people here it is.....

We have 2 Weekend Passes for DOWNLOAD FESTIVAL to give away. 

Whad'ya gotta do for em? SIMPLE! Get down the FC and for every shot of Jager you get a numbered ticket. Collect as little or as many as you want. The winner of the pair of passes will be drawn on Thursday the 10th of May @ 10pm prompt. You need to be present to win.

SO WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!!!!!!!!

This promotion is only available from Sunday to Thursday.
One ticket per Jager does not include 2-4-1 happy hour Jager.*
Passes do not include camping."


Pretty simple right? Literally all you have to do is buy jager (and we all know you're pretty good at that bit already) and turn up here on the 10th of May to see if you've won. We'll be announcing the winners at 10pm so you may as well come down and have a few beers while you're waiting right? 


*anyone purchasing 2-4-1 Jager between 5 and 8 will get 1 ticket for every 2 shots they buy! 

Mondays.

Everybody's least favourite day of the week and the weather definitely isn't helping today. But, I'll let you in on a secret. Your Monday COULD be awesome. It could be awesome because it's comedy night tonight and if you buy a ticket or come down then there are many, many treats in store.

This weeks line up is killer:


A MYSTERY SPECIAL GUEST, Stephen Grant, Matt Forde, James Mullinger and Maff Brown.

The special guest could literally be anyone. I mean, anyone. Think of any comedian (that's alive/ in the country/ BE REALISTIC.) So, no excuses, get yourself down, have a drink and some giggles.

MOTORKILL TONIGHT!

Tonight is the night! Motorhead tribute band Motorkill, Earthtide and The Red and The Black, all for FREE.

FOR. FREE.






Get out of the rain and get warmed up. We'll supply the whiskey!

My brain hurts.

If someone could please explain to us how and why there are still a shit load of tickets left for both Anti-Flag dates in May, that'd be awesome.

WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING?! IT'S ANTI-FLAG. PLAYING HERE. TWICE. IN LIKE 2 WEEKS. COME ON.

Anyway, in other news, I've got a cold, there's something living in Maggie's chimney and we're totally ready for the mayhem that is going to be Friday night's Motorkill show.


OH, and still no offer's for the Crabbies umbrella...anyone?

BUY SOME FUCKING ANTI-FLAG TICKETS. BUY SOME FUCKING ANTI-FLAG TICKETS. BUY SOME FUCKING ANTI-FLAG TICKETS. BUY SOME FUCKING ANTI-FLAG TICKETS. BUY SOME FUCKING ANTI-FLAG TICKETS. BUY SOME FUCKING ANTI-FLAG TICKETS. BUY SOME FUCKING ANTI-FLAG TICKETS. BUY SOME FUCKING ANTI-FLAG TICKETS. 

and take the crabbies umbrella because we really, really don't want it!

 Cheers. 

Crabbies Competition!

We got a random Crabbies parasol delivered today, so stay tuned to find out how you can win it, because we sure as hell don't know what to do with it and I'm sure one of you lovely people can give it a better home in your garden than we can in our cellar.

April Showers.

What is with this rain? I’m not enjoying it and I can’t imagine you guys are much either so why not make this the perfect excuse to hide in here, get some whiskey in your tummy and dry off a bit for a while. No harm in a cheeky Tuesday night whiskey session, eh? There’s nothing on tonight, but you could always come down and keep James and I company whilst sipping on a few happy hour cocktails if you're not a whiskey fan!

Wednesday brings the much anticipated, one off London show from Long Islander's Stray From the Path, fresh off of their UK tour with Architects. The eagle-eyed amongst you may have noticed that there was in fact no London date for the entire tour, so you’re pretty lucky to catch them here before they head back to the USA!

Then we’ve got Spraynard on Thursday courtesy of Banquet records – if you’ve never heard of them, they've proclaimed themselves "the demi-god's of horror core" and are best known for their sense of humour. If you were here for RVIVR, you should come to this. Definitely worth checking out. Here is a video to get you in the mood:

Then, Friday. The BIG ONE. Motorkill, Earthtide and The Red and the Black. FOR FREE. FOR. FREE. Motorkill are a Motorhead tribute band. This will be seriously awesome. Seriously.

I'll add some more little tidbits of information when and if I remember them, I think I've done myself some serious brain damage this weekend and only seem to be able to remember the last 3 hours worth of information. I blame winning a pub quiz and ending up spending our winnings at O'Neil's in Richmond on a Sunday night, dancing to songs from 80s movies soundtracks. Not my finest hour, I'll happily admit. 

Old London Road Tattoos.

It's Friday 13th (incase you've missed how many times I've mentioned it already) what better time to pay a visit to our lovely friends at Old London Road for a special, one off "13" tattoo. They're doing walk-in's between 6 and 7 today especially so you'd be silly to miss it! If you fancy checking out any of their work, being generally nosey or reading the lovely Emma's blog, then head on over to http://www.oldlondonroad.co.uk/!

Here & Now/ Redbus Noface, Saturday 14th.

"Here & Now are an English psychedelic/space rock band formed in early 1974. They have close connections with the band Gong and in 1977/1978 worked with Gong's Daevid Allen and Gilli Smythunder the name Planet Gong."

A little opportunity to check out these two bands before Saturday! Tickets are £12 on the door or £10 in advance from http://www.wegottickets.com/event/152850!

THE LAGAN THE LAGAN THE LAGAN AND ITS FREE THE LAGAN.

So tonight is the night, ladies and gentlemen. The Lagan, Darkshaft and Anonymous Tip. It's free, you've got your Lucky 13 shots for £2 and our specially created "The Luck 'O' The Lagan" cocktail for £5. Free entry and cheap drinks, cheap shots and some fucking awesome music...

WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED FROM YOUR FRIDAY 13! 

The Next Few Weeks, made easy.

• Tonight: Spore Breather/ The Red and The Black/ Hundred. Tickets £5/ doors at @ 7pm.
• Tomorrow: The Lagan/ Anonymous Tip/ Darkshaft. FREE ENTRY

• Saturday 14/4: Here & Now/ Redbus Noface. Tickets £10adv, £12 on door/ doors @ 7pm.
• Sunday 15/4: The Gentlemen's Club/ Molly's Lipps/ The Zone. Tickets £5/ doors @ 7.30pm
• Monday 16/4: OUTSIDE THE BOX COMEDY: Jarred Christmas/ Katherine Ryan/ Barry Castagnola/ Maff Brown. click here for tickets/ doors @ 8pm.
• Thursday 19/4: Spraynard/ Little Ease/ Losing Sleep/ Caves. click here for tickets.
• Friday 20/4: Motorkill - Motorhead tribute. FREE ENTRY.
• Saturday 21/4: TBA.
• Sunday 22/4: Seregon/ Desolator/ Bangover/ Death Head. Tickets £4/ doors @ 7.30pm

There's more to come, I'll update this as and when I can! 

So Far, for May we have:

• Tuesday 1/5: ANTI-FLAG
• Wednesday 2/5: ANTI-FLAG
• Thursday 3/5: XENICIBUS.
• Saturday 5/5: The Menzingers/ Rivalries. 
• Tuesday 8/5: Go Team Geek theatre.
• Thursday 10/5: Bury the Gun.
• Friday 11/5: Cobra Skulls/ Uniforms/ Everything We Left Behind. 
• Saturday 12/5: WEIRDSVILLE with The Mojo Kings/ The Dynamite Pussy Club.
• Sunday 13/5: Banquet Records TBA.
• Friday 18/5: The Jo Burt Experience/ Captain Horizon/ Star Scream.
• Saturday 19/5: Anison 
• Tuesday 22/5: Take Me Home 
• Wednesday 23/5: Death of an Artist/ Palm Reader.
• Sunday 27/5: Invect.

Tomorrow Night!

The Lagan, Anonymous Tip and Darkshaft! FREE ENTRY!! 

It's that time again, boys and girls, Friday 13th! Luckily for you, however, there will be some awesome noises coming from the venue in the form of our local favourites in The Lagan and friends! 

CLICK HERE FOR FACEBOOK EVENT! 

Motorkill - Motorhead tribute band!

Now, if there's one thing we're known for, it's for throwing a fucking awesome party and let me tell you, ladies and gents, this one will be no different! It's free, it's loud and there will be beers a-plenty. So, Friday 20th April from 7.30-ish polish off your best handlebar moustache and your cowboy boots and make sure you're in the venue ready to have your socks blown clean off...

Weirdsville

Was a great success, once again, if you missed it, you missed out! Don't worry though, you'll have another chance to party with all the Weird-O's again next month when we're joined by Mojo Kings and The Dynamite Pussy Club! See below for musical referencing and other such additional bits and pieces. As always, click the band's name to be taken directly to their facebook if you fancy it. If not, don't. That's fine too.

The Dynamite Pussy Club:

"A WELL TURNED OUT TRIO OF LOCAL SLEAZE MERCHANTS WHO'VE SUSSED A WHOLE NEW WAY OF PUTTING A WHOLE LOTTS PUNK,BLUES & FUNK IN THAT TRUNK, AT THE SAME TIME!!!!!YEEEEAH!!!!WEST COUNTRY MAYHEM WITH THEREMINS AND SAVAGE NOIZE ATTACK.THIS CLUUUUB GOT SOME SERIOUS DAMN PEDIGREE,GET WITH IT BABY SNAKES AND SHAKE THAT ASS!!!"

Mojo Kings: 

"'THE DIRTIEST, CRAZIEST ROCK'N'ROLL BAND OUT THERE, YOU WILL NEVER SEE ANOTHER LIKE THEM!!'... Apparently!!"

Sounds good right? I think so...


Another one for your diaries, we've got Long Islanders Stray From The Path, currently on tour with Architects!

18/04 - Stray From the Path/HouseFires tickets|facebook


This is their last UK date and a total one off so this is not something you want to miss!

DEFEATER/ POLAR/ ALL TEETH

Mon 2nd July 2012 - Banquet Records Present: The return to Kingston of the ridiculously awesome Defeater! Support comes from Polar (who I happened to catch the other week and I have to say, I was pretty impressed) and lovely Californians All Teeth.

I saw Defeater at The Peel with Polar Bear Club and Ruiner in like, 2009 and then again in Brighton on the same tour and they were incredible. I think it's pretty safe to say, we can't wait for this one!

I'm still alive...Just...

So, apologies for the lack of updates and interesting little anecdotes, I've been on holiday, and whilst I remember very little of the entire week, I've been told it was good. And I survived, so that's a bonus.

I managed to catch the SHARKS/CROWNS/OUR TIME DOWN HERE matinee show yesterday, well worth it. They were all fantastic. Not a bad way to kick off your bank holiday weekend and wrap up a rather messy week off. Back to work for me today though, and we've got another special bank holiday treat for you in the form of WEIRDSVILLE ROUND TWO!

Live, we have The Eviltones -


"The Eviltones deliver prime garage stomp with masterful surf-punk guitar, red raw vocals and a big bad hammerhead rhythm section pounding out the brutal and bloody backbeat to a concrete jungle call. 
Worshipping and invoking the restless, haunted ancestry that runs from the delta blues through 60’s garage into punk rock; The Eviltones devilishly distil the myths and spectres from the dark side of rock’n’roll history into high-octane, prime slices of furious death-dance burn-out boogie.
The stage show is a super-charged molotov cocktail of spit, sweat and abandon. Short, sharp shocks to the head are delivered in a formidable and furious fashion as The Eviltones struggle to remain human in the grip of some voodoo freak-show fever. Possessed, obsessed and the best dressed mess of the blues this side of the grave; shit your pants to the super-spooky sounds of The Eviltones."

And The Zipheads: 

       "Formed as Rock'n'Roll covers band The Runaway Boys in early 2005, cousins Ray and Tom learnt to play together from the age of 13   through a shared love of Punk, later being turned on to Rockabilly and Psychobilly.

In 2008 they wrote and recorded 6 songs for their debut EP (see bandcamp link below).

Joined by Drummer Will from St Albans based Ska-Punk band Kiss My Brass, all the flavours mixed together into what we now know as the archetypal Ziphead sound.

Playing a mix of classic Rockabilly, Country, Ska, Swing, Surf, Psychobilly and Reggae, the boys have played alongside Punk heavyweights Discharge and Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Psychobilly legends Guana Batz, King Kurt, Vince Ray and the Boneshakers and Demented Are Go! as well as Two-Tone heroes The Beat, Neville Staples and The Selecter.

Good punchy, catchy songs played fast and passionately"

Not bad right? As last time, it's free from 8pm-1am, there'll be movies and other such visually stimulating entertainments as well as some classics from the You Got Taste jukebox and a few other treats. It's definitely not something you want to miss.

For the rest of this month, you lucky people have:

Sunday 8th - The Litfuses/Gallows Humour/Pins and Puppets/Communion.
Monday 9th - Sick Interest/The Horny Skulls/The Beast Within.
Wednesday 11th - Glass City Vice/Pacific/Kid Capola.
Thursday 12th - Spore Breather/The Red and The Black/Hundred
Friday 13th - THE LAGAN! FREE ENTRY!
Saturday 14th - Here & Now, Redbus Noface.
Sunday 15th - Gentlemen's Club
Thursday 19th - Spraynard - Banquet Records - tickets
Friday 20th - Motorkill - Motorhead Tribute Band! FREE ENTRY!
Sunday 22nd - Seregon, Bangover, Desolator, Death Head.

Sounds good right? Don't forget we've got Outside the Box comedy every Monday night, except this week (Monday 9th) what with it being a bank holiday and all!